This article on sexual consent can’t be shared enough

We need more prominent men to speak out, so thank you Mr. Levy.

Advertisements

When You Want to Go Home to Play with Your Pussy Rather Than Continue Talking to Your Date…

This one is far less sexual than the title implies…I really did want to go home and play with my pussy…my new foster kitten that is.  She’s adorable.

Last night’s date with a new guy was kind of…boring.  I don’t know why. He looked like his photos, though his photos had given off a rugged manliness that wasn’t present in person.  He had interesting experiences in life.  He asked questions.  But I just couldn’t get into talking to him.  And I’m not sure if it was because he was lacking or that my new foster kitten is so freaking cute.  Either way, he lost out. I nursed my drink and then said I was tired (which I was) and headed home.  If I was in a different mood, maybe he would have been given more of a chance. But I wasn’t.  And the chemistry wasn’t there, I didn’t need to pretend it was, and I didn’t really feel like we needed to be friends (he had said he was open to just friendships too).

One thing I’m working on his really being in touch with the fact I truly have no obligation when I meet someone. I think this is difficult for all of us. We want to please. We want to be accepted.  But it has lead me to have sex with a couple/few guys that…meh. I mean, I don’t regret it. But I can’t say I really wanted it.  And sometimes it really is better to just call it a night and go home to play with my pussy…either one. (but not both at the same time. Ugh. No way)

Traveling prepared for sex

So, for this trip, I decided to bring a small bottle of lube and my favorite vibrator. I rarely do either, as I’m paranoid that I’ll have to explain to a nosy TSA agent and, well, I do like to keep my sex life private. 

I also have TSA pre check. So I don’t worry about liquids too much and don’t have them separated into a bag….and it turns out, the TSA pre check line happened to be closed when I go through. I’m thinking through what is just rolling around in my bag and remember there is a small thing of lube. And not just any lube. Nope. The small container of lube proudly states it’s for anal. Now, I’m not sure it differs from the non-anal. But I had bought it, figuring it couldn’t hurt as an option, and when I went to pack for this trip, it was the only small lube I could find in my drawer. So it got packed. All I could imagine was the TSA agent holding it up and asking if I wanted to use it up before it was tossed. 

But I got through security ok. Thank goodness. I dash off a funny text to the HAF guy from yesterday about my worry and relief. He responds. All is good. 

I get to my gate and notice someone sitting there who looks vaguely familiar. And I realize he’s a “friend” from my post-undergrad schooling and he’s on my flight. He also weighs about 75 lbs more than he weighed in school and looks terrible. Anyway… I don’t want to talk to him. He was skeevy and I have no reason to believe he’s changed. So I’m ahead of him in the boarding line. Get to my seat. Lift up my bag… And it has started buzzing. I contemplate whether I can pretend it isn’t, but realize that in the overhead compartment, it will amplify the buzzing. And yes, it’s not my electric toothbrush that has turned on accidentally. It is my vibrator. Wtf. 

So I am digging through the bottom of my bag to find it and notice I’m blocking people. And yes… I’m blocking that “friend”. Tuck my head down, hope I’m not recognized. Hope no one notices my bag is buzzing. Where the fuck is this vibrator! Ok. Finally find it. Turn it off. Sink into my seat… 

Now, there at circumstances where I can say “yeah, that’s a vibrator. So what?” But I’ll admit, this is one where I didn’t want to have to say that. 

Making friends all over…

I have a quick overnight business trip…had hoped to see sexy geek guy b/c it’s to his city. But 2 weeks ago he got asked to speak at something and we’re going to miss each other 😦 boo.  But last time I was in this city, I opened up a dating app and somehow due to confusion over where we were both located, ended up chatting with a guy who lives here. I figured I probably wouldn’t meet him, except he used to live in my city and visits sometimes, but he seemed cool and, well, hot as fuck.  So we kept chatting and when I found out I couldn’t meet with SGG, I let Hot as fuck (HAF) guy know I’d be in town.  It worked out that he was traveling to another city tonight, but had the afternoon free, as did I after I met with a client.  Original plan was to meet for a drink…but my hotel is a boutique hotel without a bar and I said he could just come to the hotel. I figured…I’m in a hotel. It’s MY hotel…

And he was hot. And nice. And well…he was a great fuck.  He has the right physical traits to work it. And somehow he seemed to find the fact I’m very unassuming and innocent looking to be, well, hot.  That I’m not a person you’d expect has a side that is so open sexually.  So he made me feel sexy. Even though I felt like he was out of my league appearance-wise.  And he had all kinds of little moves…he was good. Damn good. But also very concerned with my pleasure.  

This is something I’ve found…the freakier someone’s interests tend to me (at least for men), the nicer they are and the more conscientious of a sex partner they are.  Maybe they know what it’s like to feel rejected? Or they just understand the breadth of sexual experiences? Or they’re not desperate…fun afternoon. Now I’m exhausted and need to work. But definitely worth it. 

When a FWB texts you at the perfect time…

This has been a busy and stressful week at work. Nothing unexpected. I knew it would be. It just was.  And I had a big filing today, which was causing stress to keep going up…

And when I get stressed, I get horny. It’s been this way a long time.  And I probably should be clear that this is just work stress type stress. Stress about personal stuff might make me lethargic.

So, a text from one of the guys from a couple months ago couldn’t have come at a better time when I got it at about 6…wondering if I’d be free…I was planning to go for a run after work, but sometimes sex has to take priority. And tonight was one of those nights.  Luckily he could wait a bit so I could get my filing in…

I got home, had enough time to brush my teeth and feed my pets and not much else. I was still in work clothes with a hoodie when he got to my place. But we were naked soon enough. And wow. I remember the sex with him being really really really good. But it was even better.  I mean, just for regular old sex. Nothing crazy in terms of tricks or anything. We just seem to be in sync. And were last time.  And I’m definitely far less stressed.  I definitely need to make more time to see him. Damn. He’s good…And I am far less stressed.