How many times have I heard this from people who hear that I’m totally open to casual sex. It’s well-meaning and appreciated…but how often do they say the same thing to someone taking a road trip? (In fairness, some of them might).
No doubt, there are risks with non-monogamous sex. That’s why I get tested and am overall good about condoms (but I won’t pretend I’m 100% perfect if I’ve had a conversation with someone about testing and I’ve been recently tested. I have an IUD, so I’m not worried about pregnancy). I take that risk. I test for it. But I feel like even saying that receives lots of judgment. But… we wouldn’t judge someone for taking an unnecessary road trip where they expect to get laid…we’d only judge them for the sex without a condom. Even though the road trip is more likely to kill them.
Anyway, my thoughts on this topic are far less coherent than this article: http://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2015/11/the-stigma-of-sex-related-health-risks/415518/?utm_source=SFFB
Note: I am not saying people should have unprotected sex. Condoms are great. They should be used. But damn it. I notice a difference. And they interrupt the flow. And sometimes in fooling around, a condomless dick ends up inside me. Usually I have the self control after initially enjoying that to say, “ok, we should put a condom on.” But have I ever not done that? Sure. Or has the guy pulled out and cum all over me and I figure, “what the hell…his cum is everywhere. A condom isn’t going to do anything at this point”.
And yeah, I feel like I’m going to be judged for writing this admission. But if we talk actual risks, it’s not that great a risk. So, I’m being honest. And I think we all need a little more honesty about what people do, what risks are there, and what risks people take in their daily life that we don’t judge.