I’ve never appreciated my butt. When I was in high school and college, the hot girls had teeny tiny perky butts. My butt is not teeny. Nor tiny. Perky would not be a term I’d use either. To me, it’s just always been big. And something to hide rather than show off.
But a few weeks ago, I started worrying about whether my marathon training was going to cross over to the point where my butt would get too small (good news for my butt, bad news for my training, I injured myself and am not so worried about losing valuable butt fat). Um. say wut? How did that happen?
Well, a natural part of this, uh, journey has been sexting and exchanging photos. Figuring that it’s better to send a guy running due to my ample bum in advance of actually being in-person naked, when asked for photos, I generally oblige. And, to my shock, the number of men who have asked for more and more photos of my ass has grown.
And I started looking at the photos more closely (or maybe less closely) to try to understand what they saw. And I started to see it too…that, despite some cellulite and lumps, overall I have a butt that someone could grab on to. Maybe it’s juicy. Maybe it’s thick. I don’t know. But it’s feminine and kind of sexy.
Ok, should it require a male gaze of appreciation to get me to appreciate my butt? Sigh. Of course not. But I might not have lived long enough to come to my own conclusion that I have a sexy butt without prompting of the male gaze to tell me that, yes, it is desirable; the objectification of my butt by some men caused me to look at my own butt differently and to see its positives.
I think most people my age think sexting is a terrible thing that will come back and bite “kids these days” in the butt (yes, pun intended). But maybe we’re missing out on the potential positives of normalizing the non-airbrushed, “normal” human body. After all, I’m not sure I have seen many female butts (or boobs, or stomachs, or thighs) that don’t belong to actress/models with the benefit of photoshopping. Maybe living in a world where the naked body isn’t so secretive is a better thing for self acceptance than covering it.
Or maybe I just like receiving the dick pics I get in exchange 😉